r/Glasgow Tools

Title
Author	dddiamonddd
Comment	This is a fuckin doozy of a comment, so I've split it into two. It is not gendered but we would be remiss to pretend that there isn't a pattern to who experiences it the most. Not to mention that there's a very different dynamic at play when we're considering sexual harassment and assault against women versus against men. So much so that I really think they need to be separate conversations so that each issue can be given the proper attention that it needs. > I don’t think I should be silent on the issue just because it disproportionately doesn’t effect me. Show me where I said you should be silent? Be loud about it, the world certainly needs more people loudly talking about it. I'm asking you to listen to women though. > I have no problem with you taking about your experiences in this thread. Of course you should. Aside from you calling my comments "derailment". What you say about sexual harassment and assault against women should be informed by women. You do absolutely nothing to help us when we try to engage you in a discussion and you call our contributions to the conversation a "derailment". How can I POSSIBLY be derailing a conversation when I am telling the people in the conversation (that is ostensibly about things that have happened to me and other women and will likely happen to me again) the reality of the very issue that is allegedly being discussed? What use is a conversation about how to reduce sexual harassment and assault when women can't contribute? Who is the conversation for, exactly? > My problem is you posting under every comment chain that mentions there is a specific cultural problem with a minority of immigrants that it’s white men too. Because this laser focus on this minority of immigrants is coming at the expense of discussion about the wider problem. Funnelling time and money and effort into educating a minority of a minority isn't really what is needed. > Nobody is saying it isn’t. Maybe you haven't read every comment on this post, but a highly upvoted comment says this: > Maybe I’ll cop flack for this, but it’s always asian men. Not to say that white folks aren’t being creepy as well, I’m sure they are, but it’s asian men doing this and all you need to do is go to the st Enoch centre on a weekend and see asian guys well into their 20s chatting up girls that look no more than 16. When I responded to say that it's always been primarily white guys in my 14 years of hanging about in and around the city centre, he said: > I can only say what I’ve seen. Wasn’t white guys doing it when I seen it, wasn’t white guys when I’ve seen it outside the st Enoch centre. and then: > Pointing out that when I’ve seen it, it was Asian men, doesn’t mean I’d sit idly by and watch if it wasn’t. Essentially this entire post is heaving with men who are insisting that they have only really seen it from Asian guys. They are happy to speculate that white guys do it too, but he's never seen it. Now, this is confirmation bias at work in my eyes - they are primed to view an Asian guy as a predator and so they scrutinise the interaction more than they would if they saw a white guy and a white woman together. Pretty sure the vast majority of people will just saunter on past a situation that is uncomfortable for someone involved where they're both white because, frankly, it doesn't look "out of place" to people and it's well known that women (as much as we want to all believe we'd have the guy's baws ripped off the instant he crossed the line) don't often feel safe to "make a scene". Sometimes it requires a bit of scrutiny to notice that a situation is uncomfortable. But given that 90%+ of the country is white, by mere statistical probability, that guy has wandered on past a situation that he could have intervened in, but he didn't because he didn't really look too closely at it. Because it's unremarkable when a white man is interacting with a white woman in public. There's a distinct desire that I'm seeing to try and place a large portion of the blame onto Asian guys - see also the guy cutting about stating that statistics show that allegedly most rapes are being committed by Asian guys as evidence that rapes are endemic on the streets of Glasgow, but also ignoring statistics that say that 90% of victims already knew their rapist in some capacity (statistically, a rapist is a friend, a partner, a co-worker, a family member, etc. not a random person on the street), and that the statistics are all reported crimes. The vast majority of sexual crimes go unreported - Rape Crisis England summarised statistics that suggested only 15% of them get reported at all.
Reddit Link	https://www.reddit.com/r/glasgow/comments/p2dbqg/man_makes_girl_uncomfortable_central/h8ngewa/
Created	Thu 12th Aug 2021 2:18pm
Status	normal ()

This is a fuckin doozy of a comment, so I've split it into two.

It is not gendered but we would be remiss to pretend that there isn't a pattern to who experiences it the most. Not to mention that there's a very different dynamic at play when we're considering sexual harassment and assault against women versus against men. So much so that I really think they need to be separate conversations so that each issue can be given the proper attention that it needs.

> I don’t think I should be silent on the issue just because it disproportionately doesn’t effect me.

Show me where I said you should be silent? Be loud about it, the world certainly needs more people loudly talking about it. I'm asking you to *listen* to women though.

> I have no problem with you taking about your experiences in this thread. Of course you should.

Aside from you calling my comments "derailment". What you say about sexual harassment and assault against women should be informed by women. You do absolutely nothing to help us when we try to engage you in a discussion and you call our contributions to the conversation a "derailment". How can I POSSIBLY be derailing a conversation when I am telling the people in the conversation (that is ostensibly about things that have happened to me and other women and will likely happen to me again) the reality of the very issue that is allegedly being discussed? What use is a conversation about how to reduce sexual harassment and assault when women can't contribute? Who is the conversation for, exactly?

> My problem is you posting under every comment chain that mentions there is a specific cultural problem with a minority of immigrants that it’s white men too.

Because this laser focus on this minority of immigrants is coming at the expense of discussion about the wider problem. Funnelling time and money and effort into educating a minority of a minority isn't really what is needed.

> Nobody is saying it isn’t.

Maybe you haven't read every comment on this post, but a highly upvoted comment says this:

> Maybe I’ll cop flack for this, but it’s always asian men. Not to say that white folks aren’t being creepy as well, I’m sure they are, but it’s asian men doing this and all you need to do is go to the st Enoch centre on a weekend and see asian guys well into their 20s chatting up girls that look no more than 16.

When I responded to say that it's always been primarily white guys in my 14 years of hanging about in and around the city centre, he said:

> I can only say what I’ve seen. Wasn’t white guys doing it when I seen it, wasn’t white guys when I’ve seen it outside the st Enoch centre.

and then:

> Pointing out that when I’ve seen it, it was Asian men, doesn’t mean I’d sit idly by and watch if it wasn’t.

Essentially this entire post is *heaving* with men who are insisting that they have only really seen it from Asian guys. They are happy to *speculate* that white guys do it too, but he's never seen it. Now, this is confirmation bias at work in my eyes - they are primed to view an Asian guy as a predator and so they scrutinise the interaction more than they would if they saw a white guy and a white woman together. Pretty sure the vast majority of people will just saunter on past a situation that is uncomfortable for someone involved where they're both white because, frankly, it doesn't look "out of place" to people and it's well known that women (as much as we want to all believe we'd have the guy's baws ripped off the instant he crossed the line) don't often feel safe to "make a scene". Sometimes it requires a bit of scrutiny to notice that a situation is uncomfortable. But given that 90%+ of the country is white, by mere statistical probability, that guy **has** wandered on past a situation that he could have intervened in, but he didn't because he didn't really look too closely at it. Because it's unremarkable when a white man is interacting with a white woman in public.

There's a distinct desire that I'm seeing to try and place a large portion of the blame onto Asian guys - see also the guy cutting about stating that statistics show that allegedly most rapes are being committed by Asian guys as evidence that rapes are endemic on the streets of Glasgow, but also ignoring statistics that say that 90% of victims already knew their rapist in some capacity (statistically, a rapist is a friend, a partner, a co-worker, a family member, etc. not a random person on the street), and that the statistics are all *reported* crimes. The vast majority of sexual crimes go unreported - Rape Crisis England summarised statistics that suggested only 15% of them get reported at all.