r/Glasgow Tools

Hey OP, firstly I know exactly what your going through (or close to it). I’ve been diagnosed with Depression and Anxiety for about twenty years and in that time have seen a fair few different GP’s in Glasgow and the Highlands (where I’m originally from).
The first thing to say is, well done for reaching out, yep I know this sounds patronising as f*** but I really MEAN it. You mentioned in your post about having talked to some people and it’s not really helped ( again I totally get that and always come away feeling even less understood when I’ve tried to talk to loved ones and friends). But writing on here was a big step for you I’m sure so bloody well done.
Honestly I could say I’ve had pretty ok help overall, I’ve been on a variety of different meds and just recently completed a year of psychotherapy (NHS after I think about six month waiting list).
What I would say is if you can call the doctor and make an appointment (or if you struggle to do that - that might just be me tho eek - ask someone else to call on your behalf).
I’m not going to bullsh*t you and say it won’t be difficult, you’ll prob feel even more anxious awaiting the appointment (regarding face to face or phone call - I’m assuming it’ll be phone call at the moment but you never know and if you particularly feel like it would be better face to face it may be worth while saying to the receptionist).
Anxiety is so difficult and anyone that hasn’t had it would struggle to understand how it can make you feel like your dying, want to die and scared of dying all at once. It affects everything but in my personal experience I have found a v low dose of diazepam (2mg) to be helpful in taking the edge off so I can think a bit clearer. I refused to be prescribed this for years (mum is/was an addict so I’ve always been super cautious of taking anything) but three years ago I had yet another breakdown and honestly the anxiety part of it was the worst. I think I was prescribed to take twice a day and they truly helped - I don’t take them now unless I’m particularly bad (one packet lasts me a year now).
In regards to antidepressants - I’ve been on fluoxetine (Prozac), citalopram, sertraline and most recently and currently still on Venlafaxine.
Meds deffo don’t cure it (I have been trying to pluck up the courage to see my gp to discuss changing meds for about a month now so I’m in no way cured lol)
But they do help give you a wee building block to then get other help.
I’d say please try to get a doc appointment and discuss with them, hopefully they will be supportive and give you some support. The waiting lists for everything have always been long and will be even worse now so it might feel pointless to be told it could be six months for any therapy.
This might sound totally cliched but you owe it to yourself to at least try and see if there’s something that could make you feel better before carrying out your plan (you maybe don’t value yourself so maybe think of friends or loved ones if that helps?). I’ve carried out ‘the plan’ three times - each time truly wanting it to work and thinking it’s the best for my fiancée and friends. The worst part of it not working was seeing the upset it caused them (last and final attempt was five years ago and I 🤞will never do that again but I still feel like it sometimes).
Sorry I’m not sure if any of this is helpful to you I suppose I just wanted to reach out and say your not alone in this xxx