r/Glasgow Tools

I honestly can't remember all the details as I feel like I was in a bit of a trance/not acting myself at the time

If I remember correctly, I got really bad one night and phoned NHS 24 saying I'm really struggling.

They put me through to a MH nurse who was fucking USELESS (the cunt said "just go for a walk!" when I'm fucking panicking and inconsolable) which just made me feel worse

So I told him this isn't working out and that the advice he's giving me is utter shite when it comes to my level of severity

So I hung up and phoned NHS 24 again. Explained the horrible time I had with the MH nurse, in tears and telling them "I'm suicidal. A fucking walk won't cut it" and had to explain to them the severity of my mental health. That if I didn't get some sort of interference soon I was going to hurt myself (I was very suicidal a few months ago, and at one point attempted to hurt myself, tried to get sectioned and was denied because "sectioning won't give you the answers you're looking for" then the folks from Leverndale sent a suicidal woman back home with a pack of diazepam)

So because I said that, they referred me to my local MH facility and whilst I was waiting for them to get back to me over the next couple of weeks, someone from SAMH would phone me to just have a chat with me and see where my head is at for a couple of weeks.

Looking back a lot of what I was feeling was a result of autistic emotional dysregulation. I had all this emotion and didn't know what to do with it or how to control it and it made me manic. I was struggling and not realising what was happening to make me feel that way. It was as if my emotions were in control of me, not the other way around

I still cry a lot about everything I've gone through and wish I could do things differently.