r/Glasgow Tools

As some one with a lifetime of experience living in Glasgow, and having spent the vast majority of my life in closes I must ask - where do you come from?

Here is what you must do. Buy a camping chair. Go to your garden. Sit in your chair. Smile politely at them on your arrival and then sit down and get comfy. Do not seek any further reassurance or conversation - it is not needed by anyone.

If you are the kind of person that feels better by being acknowledged then by all means say hello when passing in the corridor. This is not to say they will say it back but if you feel they are ignoring you and that’s upsetting you a friendly greeting every time you pass one of them will help you with that. They will eventually respect your perseverance. Even if they still think you’re a weirdo.

Last point to make here. Quite unusual that everybody in a close would have taken a dislike to you for no reason. So either your being paranoid or you’re overlooking something which is bothering them. Believe me on this - It is not in your interest to find out what that is. If they’re staying quiet you will only make your life more difficult by asking. Because when you know if you don’t make changes you’ll find out what being hated and ostracised is like in a close - at the moment their politely ignoring you. That’s the better of the two options.

Question: are you hanging yer washing round the back?

Glaswegians are simultaneously the most friendly and the most dangerous neighbours to have. The most loyal of friends and the Firecrest of enemies.